I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
its mom's weekend..did we need to couger proof the apt?
he made a joke about you fucking his daughter...i think youre golden
Half the people who compete die. All the rest either lose their minds or grow an innate fear of sharks, vodka, and fishbowls
I tried to interpretive dance to Candy Shop to stop the awkwardness.
Piñatas plus fireworks don't mix well
What am I supposed to say? "Hi new uncle in law once I tried cocaine in Mexico and every once in a while i motorboat strangers. so happy to be a part of your family"
Just heard a girl ask "Wait you're not my boyfriend?!" to a guy wearing the Mickey to her Minnie Mouse on my way home. Made me feel better about myself.
I finally had to say "that's the hole where I pee" for him to understand.
I left her alone for a few minutes and she's already using a guy on his hands and knees as a chair while another guy is serving her margaritas.
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
I like that you're more concerned about how I would find the time to clone you, than the fact that I have your blood.
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
Randomize
