I just remembered we said the Lord's Prayer before we went out last night.
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
Well I tried to steal a golf cart. I fought with the Chick-Fil-A cow. And other things.
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
At least in the future when we're all real people we can laugh about the time we all had scabies together?
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
I gave him a bunch of ideas to use to spice up their sex life. Say what you will, I am the best 'other' woman ever!
So I just stirred my shower drink with my razor.
I'm not going to ask which end you used.
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
I was giving him a blowjob but we had to stop because he started crying when his cat walked in and started staring at us
PS- My flight is being emergency landed bc someone smuggled cats on the plane.
i'm gonna friendzone myself so you dont have to
he BROKE his KNEE while we were getting it on, called 911 and the ambulance that showed up contained two paramedics, ONE WAS HIS FUCKING SISTER!!! HOW IS THIS MY LIFE?!?!?!
Poor life choices...?
You ate my ass why wouldn't I remember you
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