john hughes is dead. crushing any and all dreams of me ever being in an 80's john hughes film. bummer.
she wrote "SORRY" in her vomit and left
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
All of our toilets in my house are broken. Thank God I've practiced peeing in the sink enough.
Just hit a cone using a lit sparkler. Tastes like I might die but it was magical.
"Bring the kids" is the most terrifying 3 words I've ever heard in my life.
I just stuck my fingers down her throat so she could puke. I mean what are friends for
Oh my god she just threw up on her dog
I was wondering how I got the burn marks on my boobs and then I remembered....
The baked potato bra?
I'd rather be sodomized with a fullly decorated Christmas tree.
purchased gas station taquitos and condoms at 4 this morning. It has been magical..
Well, I told him that it's not all about him. Then I gave him the best blow-job in the history of blow-jobs.
I just want to bone him one last time before he moves across the country with his new (average looking) girl friend.
i think i just naturally attract stoners
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