So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
Dan is more possessive of me than a Michael Jackson is of McCully Caulkin
was*
True, R.I.P.
isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
it's like your virginity...sometimes you have to pretend like it's still there
Apparently Bin Ladens last act of terrorism is cock blocking me....
Did the game of beer pong go wrong before or after the cops and fire department showed up?
He put up a Facebook album attempting to sell off their Harvard furniture. Items for sale include: his friend, a broken lamp, an item described as a 'carpet and/or sleeping bag', a pair of paint stained cargo pants, size 'Tyler', and a self proclaimed $3 bottle of wine, which he is offering for $2
He said the last thing he remembered thinking was: 'Why is this vagina spinning?' Too drunk sex is no ones friend.
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
I really enjoy how cavalier you're being about your chlamydia
I'm suffering a hangover from deep within. I feel like the half of the parts of my body are permanently laced with alcoholic substances
He thought I was gay. I had to explain I just really like wearing flannel.
Can you please venmo me emergency money? i have no pants.
PSA Do not blow dry your junk.
Randomize
