i only shaved half my leg
on purpose
I wish I was a guy so I could jack myself off anytime I wanted to
she told me i should dip my dick in chocolate and then let her blow me since it was her 2 favorite things. weird or my new valentine for this year?
so apparently mom and dad slept together on the first date
i guess it runs in the family.
Woke up this morning with a junior police officer sticker over my nipple this morning.
He puked, did more shots, and then pissed in a drawer. We thought it was bad enough and all of a sudden...boom-clothes come off and he passes out with slippers and a styrofoam hat on and a guitar hero guitar in hand pretending he was slash.
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
I fucked my ex boyfriend to get shrooms for you guys
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
Take off your clothes and see if he wants to have sex, that's a good way to find out
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
Dude I asked him to get me beef jerky at 4 am and he actually walked to CVS to get it. CVS closes at 12 but it was the perfect opp to dip out
so I think we need to change lawn care services...the guy woke me up by the pool while I was naked...told me he already picked up all the beer cans for us and gave me his number for the next time we party...
Good morning 7am walk of shame. It's been awhile.
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
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