I'm good, just tired from chardonnay and giving hand jobs.
I'm so fucking pissed that I wasted my shooting star wish on him and his little penis.
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
I have an excuse to be a whore in Mexico. I'm conducting an experiment to see if small dicks are caused by the poor drinking water.
I'm not judging you... I'm judging our friendship
I think that girl got really offended when I made out with baby Jesus.
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
I'm pretty sure they kept making references about gangbanging me but I was too stoned to catch on, I just sat there and stared at his kitten.
Rick two cubicles down puked and that triggered three others puking into their trash cans as well. The janitorial staff hates it when we go drinking on a work night.
Just jacked in the family restroom in the hospital while eating beef jerky and looking at reddit gone wild.
And that is why I love you so much. You have the same cold black heart as me.
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
You know you're stoned when you tell your dog you're stoned only to realise he's not in the pickup
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
Randomize
