This last weekend single handedly took me off the liver transplant list
Nick just found a baggie of 3 year old shrooms in his desk drawer and downed it all with cheap white wine. I am not on vomit duty tonight.
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
Going stoned out of mind to my sociology exam because it's really just a pizza party. I love community college.
I think rescheduling my finals around when Im going to be hungover is responsible
Literally I thought my ears were pouring out blood. That high.
The party got busted because you two got caught having sex on the neighbors trampoline, come on man.
I have grass duct taped all over my body
Is she still in your room?
Not for long. My plan is to smoke her out like a small woodland creature.
I am the Angelina Jolie to his Billy Bob Thorton. We just don't work.
and Katie got too high with the tow truck driver and wants to go home
Pretty sure I love my nipple piercing more than I'll love my children someday
Just bought plan b at 8am. Then the cashier asked if I wanted to donate to the children's miracle network. Fml
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
He sided with his father, so I slashed his tires. I’d say that’s a fair trade.
Randomize
