Do you have swine flu?
I know my taste in men is not always top notch; however, I don't sleep with swine.
Pigs, yes. Swine, no.
Im going to bring a boy home tonight, and not tell him that I have my period. So when he tries to fuck me, I say no, and look really classy. Then he thinks I'm marriage material. So I give him head.
i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
i'm sorry, i thought "hey, she wants TO FUCK YOU" was a good enough cue
I kept pulling the $1 bills off the stage and told everyone "no no no she has to work for this money"
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
Please assure him that the flying penis statue is for display purposes only.
Literally just saw a 7 year old intently rub his penis on the metro. I'm not ready for this
At IHOP. It feels weird and sad that your cleavage isn't here for me to try to toss paper wads into.
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
I can't believe you guys got into a sword fight over a chicken nugget
Oh, so that's where all the scratches came from...
It shouldn't be this hard to find someone who you haven't blown.
Nothing cures your heart after a boy calling you unattractive than a big fat dick
I'm hungover and in a fort. And I hate you.
So many questions
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