I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
I didn't realize how hung over I was until I rolled over and the world rolled over with me.
Responsibility does not care about your dick.
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
He somehow managed to bang-mail me last night. I woke up this morning to a voicemail from 1:54 a.m. of moaning and screaming. I now know how talented he is and how annoying I am to have sex with.
It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.
now that you've tased me I refuse to buy you flowers
I guess I'm in a committed relationship. We just had shot 1 of 3 of Gardasil. I'm now dead inside.
I'm sitting at work trying to dust glitter off my pants. I can't hang out with her anymore.
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
If a cop comes up to me I'm whipping out my cock, swinging it around and singing the national anthem
I'm sitting at my kitchen table alone dressed as a dinosaur smoking bowls in the dark. Is this rock bottom? Or is this living the dream? Who's to say
If only he'd realize the fondness I have for his genitals.
Can you get the dildos out of the shower before the maids come?
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
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