you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
smoking a cig and getting head on the last night of my cruise. and she doesn't mind that i'm texting you right now. this is now on my list of top 10 nights of my life.
My favorite part about you getting arrested is having to explain the prosthetic leg in the front seat.
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
No amount of marijuana is enough to justify blood on my ceiling
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
He's drinking 50/50 vodka/water out of a camelback. Disaster would be a compliment at this point.
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
If you find my purse on your yacht please call me - girl you slept with after yacht party
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
Yeah he told me he wanted a serious relationship, but he's posting pictures of his dick on Kik.
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
Banged former boss. Adulthood achievement unlocked.
the police dropped me off. that's how my night went.
Randomize
