sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
the ladder is at the bottom of the pool
we got 12 live crabs and then we got really stoned and know we're playing with the crabs. thats nom watermellon nom. now i'm plaing with a crap whos such a gentleman
I cannot start working out. If I start to look better, I'll ruin ugly women's chances forever. So, really...I'm doing them a favor...think about it.
Your dress got me laid by one of Obama's Secret Service members. Patriotic duty, check.
I didn't realize how drunk I was until my vagina was in the snow.
I'm going through a really dark time right now
I don't want to hear it man. I just jerked it to a pic of my ex wife in a bikini. Buck up
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
Dude just walked up to me, gave me his number and said, if this number ever calls its my penis,better keep that one handy. I cant lie its the best pick up line ever, im calling his penis.
You stuck your false lashes to your upper lip and then asked that ONE kid with facial hair if your "mustaches could touch" as an excuse to make out.
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
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