i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
oddly enough my penis is pretty tan. the part of my body that gets the least amount of sunlight is tanner than most of the rest of my body.
I think its part of male evolution. Pretty soon they'll have diamonds on them and taste like chocolate.
stuffed animals make me feel really maternal.
You guys better make it up to the cabin in time for mud wrestling on Saturday. I'm not kidding. You know when I joke, and now is not one of those times.
I AM SENDING THIS TEXT MESSAGE SO I DON'T LOOK AT HIM. THANK YOU FOR RECEIVING IT.
I woke up at 4 am to my roomate peeing all over my clean laundry. He thought he was in the bathroom and yelled at me for being in the bathroom with him while he was peeing.
Did you blow the guy you weren't supposed to hook up with again in the bathroom of pita pit? Cause that happened last night...
Im playing lifeguard in my own bathroom. How's ur night?
They had their heads out of the car singing the wrong words to the national anthem as we drove through traffic of people leaving the fireworks. AMURICA
I knew I'd like her from the moment she supported me messing around with my co-worker on my lunch break
I'm deleting Tinder. I got there he rubbed my back and then proceeded to jerk off on me.
You're not gonna like every guy whose dick I put in my mouth
Do the security cameras outside your house capture sound? If so your whole family is going to hear me describe my threesome
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
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