I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
no homo or anything but the way you were dancing with that girl gave me a boner
I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
Why was I handcuffed to the roof?
It was easier then trying to explain why you couldn't fly
we knew you were done when they played It's All Coming Back To Me Now by Celine Dion and you started crying
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
no one could get around him on the stairs cause he surrounded himself with all the empties he could find, he said he was building a fort. then he passed out on them.
We attempted to microwave fifteen corndogs in the microwave and may have ruined it. Also there were fake mustaches on all of his appliances...he said he doesn't like drunk me.
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
You peed on a pole and declared to a cop that it was your pole and yelled at him to not even look at it, and then yelled at all of us for looking at it.
I wish the guy I was sleeping with wasn't on house arrest.
I'm trying to make sure he doesn't drown in the toilet. Because I'm a nice lady.
I can't believe I slept with a girl who has the words shucks in her vocabulary. I'm getting less picky by the day..
oh and i figured out why we kept smelling vomit. ive got vomit on my socks. putting the heater on my feet was not the best of ideas.
I have a mailbox and I don't know why.
Randomize
