People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
yeah bitch needs to recognize there's only one person with this face
the best part is my dad got arrested for the same thing at the same bar 30 years ago... so he cant be mad
My roommate is on the phone with one of her friends trying to figure out how she threw up IN her pants. I'm not sure whether to burst out laughing or direct her towards Plan B.
i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
I'm so tired I just poured monster in my coffee.
And it tastes incredible.
And I have chest pains.
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
I can give you five reasons its your baby
and I can give you 10 reasons it's not, but I'm busy so I'll just go with you have the wrong number. And also I'm a straight girl.
I wouldn't say I LOVE Pacman. I mean, sure, I'd battle against you in an epic Pacman struggle for blow jobs and glory. But I mean, who wouldn't?
I took out the emergency phone in the elevator and replaced it with a bottle of vodka. The game is simple, do a shot for the number of the floor you're going to. Best suggestion box tip ever.
Decided to make myself tequila gummy bears but got impatient and just drank the bowl of tequila.
That jawline could fucking have its way with me.
How... how did you get Adam Lambert's shoes? Does he know you have them? DID YOU STEAL ADAM LAMBERT'S SHOES?! Oh my God I am so turned on right now.
theres a girl in the library eating whip cream out of a starbucks cup... only whip cream, im way to high for this shit
Randomize
