I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
Its 11am everyones wasted wearing sombreros and eating fresh produce..cesar chavez would be very proud
She can't drink and she can't smoke weed. She might as well be dead to me.
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
In the middle of fucking me, she said "Hold on, I need my Hulk hands."
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
On a totally unrelated note, captain four hour sexcapades lost it in his boxers this morning and tried to pretend it didnt happen. Lmao
You want a summary? Scottish women that start drinking at 7 am. Cherries soaked in moonshine. Japanese beer. Old men smoking stuff that I'm pretty sure is illegal here and in Japan. One is doing a karaoke striptease. There's your summary.
He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.
I'm really hot. went tanning and this cheeseburger shirt like isn't breathable
all I'm saying is if you're gonna fuck a fat chick do it in a pool it's like zero gravity or something
how did you graduate high school
My breasts were aching with rage.
what better way to celebrate the birth of jesus christ than to get embarrassingly intoxicated and make poor decisions!?
99% of the contents of my handbag are ketchup packets and condoms. I feel that says a lot about me as a person.
I'm still alive btw, in case you were worried about my well being.
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