you mean i was at the winter classic?
You kept spitting the skittles out cause you said they tasted like "balls of sandpaper"
Do you want the really bad news or the bad news? Or do you want it in chronological order?
Watching porn with a bag of marshmallows. Thats when you know you're stoned.
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
Im otw to class. I was at the Library. Just past three girls with a bottle of tequila playing dizzy bat.
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
THIS IS NO TIME FOR SHAME JOSH. JUST GOTTA GET IT IN. PURELY FOR LEVELING UP PURPOSES
she basically told me that her vine videos last longer that I do
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
And we had three hours of crazy sex then his roommate ate pizza off me while I was sleeping.
You should never be more than a quarter of a mile from a working toilet
Preach!
I HAVE PIZZA MONEY AT ALL TIMES IT'S CALL EMERGENCY PLANNING
Damn it. If you ever throw me again, take video.
So anyway, I'm just floating along life with my vibrator and low expectations.
Randomize