Words of Wisdom: ordering a pitcher of whiskey cokes, putting a straw in it, and calling it your drink is not socially acceptable
i wish exes would disappear into a world where we never have to deal with them again, and they can just create drama for each other. Then if they wanted to talk to us, they would have to apply to get a "visa" to come back to our world.
I like waking up with a slight hangover cause I'm dehydrated and it makes me feel thinner.
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
I just wanted to yell " i am not a shake weight!!"
I guess I just got drunk and ordered a mini fridge off the internet. At least now I know the 200$ that was missing from my checking account wasn't spent on lap dances only.
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
I dont think getting to 3rd base with a girl you barely know is the type of memory they had in mind when they named the park "memorial park"
I need to stop ravaging the freshman dorm like a virginity-snatching dragon.
Is it sad that I have better conversations with his roommate before or after sex than I do with him in general?
I successfully convinced a drunk NDSU student that their school does not have a football team and another that they weren't in Fargo. I'm a dangerous sober shark in a sea of drunks.
I just watched a stripper purchase $43 of Rockstar and corn nuts. Godamnit! We need helmet cams.
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
I started the day with dreams of getting laid and ended it with the reality of eating Taco Bell in my bed with my dog.
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