you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
Just puked in a mcdonalds cup while driving. Didn't even swerve.
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
I've come to realize that after waking up this morning for work no one wins in bar dice.
We decided to cut you off after you insisted on eating peanuts by the dumpster
The difference between you and me last night was that I didn't remember getting into the cab and you didnt know we were in one.
lets just say that i have already today: gotten drunk, got in a fight, got stranded an hour away from home, found a ride, sobered up, and slept. woken back up, and here i am. its been a long day. Day drinking is bad for friendships.
The mystery gender stripper never showed up with that party burrito last night.
You passed out while holding my hair during a blow job.. i think your gona have to earn back blow jobs
I was talking about you wanting my dick, but that works too
She's in the bathroom. Literally just told me she could make a guy cum using just her words. Not bad for Sunday brunch.
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
Made a pinky promise to a lesbian on crack in WeHo. No one knows what I promised
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
So drunk I thought the door was feeling me up for a seconds
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