but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
I found it funny that her boobs actually kinda felt like a bag of sand. the 40 year old virgin should feel better about himself.
i just burped and it tasted like condom. please tell me i wasn't lame and made that guy wear one for a bj last night.
I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
your ex girlfriend just barged in my house, drunk, mumbled something about "car strip", and put a huge hole in my drywall with her head.
Your cousin just asked the bartender to start a round of vagina shots. Not body shots. Vagina shots. We're taking her out more often.
Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised?
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
Wanna shave the hair on my back? If you're offended I was joking, if not I'll bring booze and maybe you can do other regions too.
Never should have deleted her from my facebook. My new girl is so much hotter than she is, I just want to passive aggressively rub it in her face
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
Hey so I got my period
Thank god I wasn't ready to deal with sober you for 9 months
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
Randomize
