Got home from the bar at 4am. 100% sober, unlaid. Epic fail or responsible behavior?
Responsible fail?
yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
The make-up sex just reminded me why we broke up in the first place.
So then I told him that only a restaurant managed by a florida fan could run out of ketchup
I stayed up for an hour trying to make my room stop spinning and then I realized it was bc my fan was on
Drank another frat president under the table. Thinking of starting my own, gonna call it Alpha Phi Alcoholics
We could be the people that go there! Shuffleboard n shit. Meet strippers.
You had me at shuffleboard and strippers
Bring enough bail money and little extra for tacos after
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
He ate shrooms at 9:30, said, "see you later," and left. I am alone on New Years.
I'm gonna face reality, tomorrow morning is not on my hungover agenda.
GOOD MORNING. Have you seen the Avenger vibrators?
I just coughed and my vagina hurt. We need to hook up more.
I just paid $10 for tinder plus so that I could change my location to Rio and match with Olympic Athletes
Sorry about the confusion with the nudes last night that was rude
Randomize
