just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
Using what I learned in my global terrorism class last semester to sneak booze onto my cruise. thanks college.
Overdraft my account again. Parents are starting to ask questions. What would go over better a gambling or drug addiction??
Sadly him cutting me out of the duct tape dress was NOT the most awkward part of the night. It was a littleeee moist under there.....
Can an epipen be used as a tranquilizer ?
Is "sorry I booted you out mid-fuck last night" a good icebreaker?
tried to chug a glass full of ice cubes. went better then expected.
Your exhaustion is probably due to your rampant sexual urges and the fact that you live the same life as a raccoon.
I just had to kick out lesbian wedding crashers. They literally wanted to punch me. I threatened to call the cops so they went outside and smoked a joint.
Yeah. Got a major ego boost when she said she felt like she had just fucked King Arthur. Buying some donuts later to celebrate with, wanna join?
Was your wine and cheese snap taken from the toilet?
I'm here. Help me get the salsa and bong inside.
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
She turned down sex for beer pong. I'm not sure if I should be disappointed or not.
There’s so much sex at the hospital I’m beginning to think scrubs were invented to make duty booty easier
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