I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
Nothing says "I love you" like a full raw dog.
I mean she's dancing like an epileptic patato and i'd like to slap her
IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
If we keep treating our bodies like amusement parks we have another 10 years left at best.
you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
Just found two Xanax on the floor at the tanning bed. And yes, Im taking them...looks like going to get cancer is paying off
Found out that no one else got Christmas bonuses...and you said nothing good could come from sleeping with my boss.
I gave up trying to understand them years ago. Now I'm just trying to fuck them.
If this party got busted it would be an improvement
First memory of my senior year: Going into registration still drunk from last night.
I actually want to work out for some reason... I think it's my brains way of telling me it doesn't like living in a fat body.
Is it weird that I noticed my lower half feels strange and then further realized it's bc I'm wearing underwear to bed for the first time in weeks..maybe months?
So somehow today's lecture on the immune system turned into me having to stand up and explain female ejaculation to the class.
So I'll bring my machete and we can smoke your shit.
Out of context, that is a hilariously scary message.
Randomize
