ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
I'm gonna die fat and alone and all they will find is pizza crusts
Thank God. You really dodged a small penis there.
She opened a beer bottle with her armpit and then gave me a cigarette from the waistband of her underwear. I dont know if I want to be her or marry her.
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
THIS IS NO TIME FOR SHAME JOSH. JUST GOTTA GET IT IN. PURELY FOR LEVELING UP PURPOSES
Hey where the fuck is the rest of my beer? Lets start this day off right
He told me he needed "space" but then goes and likes my insta of panacakes.. Done.
Looking for my adderal, only found acid. What a shame
Why can I remember how tall Nicki Minaj is from looking up her height once months ago, yet after weeks into the semester I can't even remember where any my classrooms are located
Importance
We were making fun of some people having sex on the beach, an hour later we were having sex on a golf course
You kept licking me last night.... and said I tasted like jello. Next time, lay off the jello shots, okay?
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
He just kept going down on me. And he was all like, do you mind? No motha fucka, who would? All of his ex's, apparently. Whatever, he's a gem and I'm keeping him.
After he finished, he fell on the floor and whispered "finally satisfied"
Randomize