can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
I went for the touchdown every play, and I think I ended up with herpes.
Literally he has the smallest penis I've ever felt since 8th grade.
just crush a couple of percocets into it. tell him sam adams came out with a new beer. flavored with sleep.
Wheres my "thanks for using birth control effectively and not contributing to the downfall of society" card.
oh no, don't get me wrong.. she IS really pretty. If you are in to horses or Sarah Jessica Parker.
Just got blown in a rental car. I need to get rear ended more often
I should know better than to trust a man I've seen cry on multiple occasions to give me accurate sports information.
I GOT A VENDING MACHINE FOR OUR LIVING ROOM
and then we all passionately sang "what if god was one of us" until everyone passed out in the grass
If I get to the point of singing Man of Constant Sorrow then please god let me do it, record it, then cut me off.
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
That bitch claimed that you said it was ok if she drank your vodka. Obviously she has never met you
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