Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
My teachers should feel privileged to see me this morning, after the amount of alcohol I consumed last night.
He just walked in our room casually and said "big girls are hungry"
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
I just dropped off shoes at Mike's hotel. The chick he hooked up with last night stole his phone and shoes.
Why am I the only one concerned that there's a dog in the movie theatre?
I only put bad things in my body...jack, caffeine, chocolate, pills, and rich's cock. It's like being holistic but exactly opposite
she puked ON me while she was on top, worst holiday hookup ever
If we can't get laid at a bar crawl, we should just quit life.
she basically told me that her vine videos last longer that I do
We really gotta change brands again because 2-ply is making us feel like the celebrities we aren't.
New low. I just threw up in the shower at 4pm. Nothing like leaving behind my 20s with class.
I just opened my travel toothbrush holder and it smelled like vodka...maybe a vodka cranberry. This says a lot about my vacations.
I just remembered that I insisted everyone watch porn together last night.
It's officially "let him eat me out in a sundress with no panties" season. Needless to say the first date was a success.
Randomize