kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
he proceeded to punch 3 mailboxes in a row and when i asked him why, he said "because they were talking shit"... i need a new boyfriend. and a new life.
This guy in church just had a prayer request to help him get through his hangover. He is my new hero.
you flashed the cab driver so we didn't have to pay the fare and then you decided you were on a roll so you flashed the guy at the maccas drive through... safe to say your boob job was the best idea ever!!
Didn't get to fuck her. Had to leave abruptly through window. Explain later.
It's only been a week and i've already broken my no summer randoms rule twice.
I think the camel was justified in biting me.
yea, there's something about a stripper whipping you with your own belt that makes you think
"can of pringles" is totally a legitimate measure of time
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
"I feel morally obligated to vote for him since he's my drug dealers dad"
You're such a good friend. You send me pictures of your boobs when I'm sad. I will always appreciate that.
If I died tonight, I'd be content knowing you were the last person to see my boobs.
apparently I got pissed off that no one would let me spray them with a bottle of champagne at midnight of the new year. so I sprayed myself with one shirtless in the near freezing cold outside
She puked on the floor because she said she really liked to clean.
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