I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
I just passed on expense account drinking, this must be the worst hangover ever.
Pillow talk just revealed that he originally thought I was 16.
do you think the bartender judged us for asking for shots of well vodka and water chasers?
I refuse to have another spring break doomed by pregnancy.
The guy I met last night said we had a real connection and gave me his AA coin because he met me during his relapse
Besides the flaccid incident, it was decent. Average sized. So this is my life now. Loneliness and lackluster sex.
I'm like a walking PSA for tequila shots
If this were a real emergency kilted men wielding claymores and riding giant badgers would hve rescued said Guinness. So clearly this is just a hypothetical
So I got this new job… ever been fucked in a corner office before?
He stopped me in the middle of a blow job to call his grandma for her birthday.
At least he has family values.
We need some Captain and Fanta. That shit will change your life. Sidenote, bring an IV drip to hook me to in the morning
Someone just said “I need to use up this money before I’m tits up under the dirt” so I think I’m going to start using that in my daily vocabulary.
She had a toddler. It threw up and then some guy said party foul and put it on the porch. Going back next Friday.
Randomize
