i just uploaded pictures of my nephew, and you & d puking in the same toilet. i think i should keep them in the same album. show my nephew what he has to look forward to.
Woke up and went out for a cigarette and it was dead quiet. It was like the world just knew how many mistakes were made last night.
I had to throw up. it was the only way to avoid kissing her after she swallowed..
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
Some dude just came up to me and stroked my beard, smiled and left. Shave?
Cover your phone. Photos of streaking frat guys incoming.
Yes, I have your ice luge mold. I'll do a prisoner exchange for the beer bong
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
Also, the greatest of ironies: I got shampoo confiscated by security while Corey managed to get pot through. MERICA!
She walks around topless and loves making sandwiches. That's how a one-night stand turned intoa relationship
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
Who gets call-your-ex-from-4-years-ago drunk on a Thursday??
You know it's been a rough week when you funnel beers by yourself.
You were on the train yelling, "THIS TRAIN NEEDS TO GO FASTER SO I CAN GO HAVE SEX WITH MY BOYFRIEND!!!"
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
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