You think if I promise to behave for the rest of my life, god will let me fuck her on the regular?
Just got a lapdance on the metro. She said she was on maternity leave and needed the practice.
No dude trust me, just go a strip club at their busiest hours and pick the ugliest chick. Guaranteed she blows you for under 20$, the record stands at $7.67 and a pen from Bank of America,
Blow job bear ended up in my bed last night. She didn't live up to her costume.
Dude, she sent me a nude of her posing in the mirror and her dad was in the reflection
Do you think if I tell the hot Santa at work that I want a sugar daddy for Christmas that he'll get the hint?
He expects to fuck my tits but will ignore me in public.
I think i'm going to homewreck at this Disney on Ice show.
Duuuuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fruuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fuuuck
My entire news feed is ice bucket challenges. I wish there was a hide from feed button like FarmVille
That's it. I'm moving to LA & sitting on his face.
this periodpocalypse needs to be over. I need head
It's obvious you're hotter. You've been doing a married guy for almost 2 years.
Can I come over?
Sorry I gave up dick for lent. Hit me up on Good Friday tho
HE CALLED HIMSELF HOT BAR GUY.
If I remember correctly he wasn’t
Randomize
