I'm drinking early times at a fridays on wednesday night. This entire bar is going to see my dick by last call.
alright she left, finally time to fart up the room
I have decided to cut my hair. This is based solely on the fact there is too much of it to clean vomit out every Sunday afternoon.
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
do you remember waking up from your blackout, kissing me ever so softly on the stomach, and saying "i love you bro. so much," then passing back out?
Just heard a guy on the phone saying " ya ill buy the eight ball " then came to my register to ask what asile the sugar substitute is on.
Omg 230 lb butch lesbian with a mustache grabbed my dick. I need an adult
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
What's worse: not calling my parents in Dallas to make sure they're alright or not taking shelter to masturbate all over my douchebag roommates clothes?
I worry about you.
It's fine. I wouldn't trust either of them to be my workplace drug buddy.
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
Update. A gay dude just told me I'm the most beautiful thing with a vagina he as ever seen. How should I feel about this?
Because bro, I don't want your dick being touched mid conversation.
Dude I had sex with her and she STILL thinks I'm gay. I don't know what else to do.
My vagina knows your penis is sad about Andrew Luck. You should come over and let her comfort him in his time of need
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