I just hope my dad was drunk enough to not remember the whole convo we had about anal.
quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
Haha he acted like he's never seen a tampon catapolt across the hall before
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
Tequila is the liquid version of celery. I lose more calories during tequila drunk and the following sexual activities than I gain by drinking it...
he came within less than a minute of me blowing him. this was our second night hanging out in a row. for an almost 30 year old italian man, he is NOT living up to his country's reputation
I just stood next to my childhood self. Fuck, I'm really stoned...
Charles Darwin would shit his pants if he saw that we managed to survive that weekend.
I'm starting a point system. For every 2 beer runs i do for u slackers i get a free bottle of Barefoot.
The fire department told the police that I was inside the burning building trying to pee in the rest of the electrical Outlets. Booyaka.
My gyno overestimated by 3 TIMES the amount of sex we have per week. First of all, he must think I'm a freak. Secondly, I think we should catch up.
Oh yeah and one of the strippers brought you chips and water when you were passes out next to the toilet. So that was nice
Dude I puked in a snow bank and then fell face first into it
Why don’t they have healthy alcohol yet?
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