She said as long as i don't wake her up she doesn't care what hole i use.
Got yourself a keeper right there.
You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
I'm so hungover even the car commercials make me nauseas
It's official, my little sister has hooked up with more girls than I have.
She clogged the toilet and got it out with a seven eleven bag. I tried to tell her no but she was convinced that was the logical thing to do.
The last thing I remember before blacking out was telling Jamie that she was too fat even for my standards. The first thing I remember after blacking out was waking up next to her.
Hey.. Here's a thought for the evening. There's only two more sleeps until I fuck you so hard my back teeth will convulse.. Here's too Tuesday! Woohooooo
got blackout drunk at the conference and wandered around Minneapolis with a homeless person until one of the other interns found me...I think I'm ready for adulthood.
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
But I mean how many guys can say they get blow jobs and grilled cheese with football
So now I know what having sex while surrounded by chickens feels like.
I grabbed the pretzel bag with my toes last night. I think that day of yoga had paid off.
Hungover on St. Patrick's Day. I did this backwards.
My feet surprised me
she was all excited about us being eskimo sisters and then i was just like "alyssa i've literally been inside of you" and she got even more excited
Randomize
