And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
just friend requested my arresting officer from last night. too soon??
he called you a drunk bob the builder and you proceeded to explain how you were going to build ramps throughout the house
Every time I get scared about the fact that I'm falling for him I remember that he juggles and is hung like a mastadon and everything is a-ok.
Your excessive judging is making this uncomfortable
Im also drinking whiskey while on a treadmill wearing high heels so let's consider that for a moment.
From the guy that lifted you into a fan I'm sorry
I have fruit by the foot roll-ups. I wonder if a man could tie them together and make an editable bra....
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
He just sent me a picture of himself naked while cooking pancakes and he made the caption "bitchin' in the kitchen"
I don't believe in coincidence. I believe in the stars aligning perfectly to sodomise me in public. Who ever said I was cynical?
I drank so much that my feet don't feel like my feet
Just asphyxiate me and toss my corpse in the Ocean. It'll be easier than whatever the next four or eight years will bring.
thank god my bra was in my purse... were all good
Randomize