"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
In the airport and just saw a little boy put his head in his mother's crotch... I guess he took a whiff because he backed up and said loudly, "mommy your pee-pee is stinky!"
Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him.
But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed.
She had a maple leaf tattoo behind her ear and told me she liked my "playoff beard".
Only in Canada would your laziness be applied to hockey and rewarded.
despite contrary belief, getting peanut butter off your balls is not as easy as it sounds
sometimes i think my sole purpose in life is to cockblock my roommate
I had to assert my dominance as Alpha Drunk.
I woke up tied to my bed while she was in the corner staring at me while eating cereal. Interesting night!
Sadly he is straight as an arrow that is designed by a robot computer from the future with lasers.
This saddens me. Mostly because I want to see the schematics on that robot.
wanna come over? I have movies.
sure, what movies
porn or disney, your choice
Also I'm sorry for asking you to shave my vagina for me last night
I kinda got drunk and threw my debit card into a bonfire so I don't have any money at the moment lol.
you walked 30 min all the way back to the dorms at 2am?
i was more bummed that i dropped all my skittles.
Is it wrong for me to wish my cat had arms to get me a beer?
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