did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
while 90% of the female population goes to worship a fictional character tonight at midnight, I will be taking advantage of having the bars ALL TO MYSELF.
can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
No, I've only ever seen his brother's dick. So when I have lucid sex dreams, I just do a little cut and paste in my mind and stick his bro's package onto him.
I think this girl gave me a handjob thinking that I would help her with her cell phone bill
omg. that's awesome
Dance move was taxi-ing on the runway then taking off in a plane. All the boys wanted to beat you up cause they were like "who is this angel flapping her arms like a bird in the bar i must have her"
I couldn't drown my sorrows in an ocean of jack daniels. They may have scuba gear.
So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
Oh and .... you'll love this: my life coach says you writing my online dating profile isn't a horrible idea.
He washed his dick in my kitchen sink after sex. I think he might be a keeper.
I had to google some of the kinky sex shit she was telling me she was into.
If that is not a reason to propose to her then I don't know what is
The next time you invite me out to a bar full of cougars warn me first. I never felt like a piece of meat before.
this is a mass text: the cage has been opened. repeat, the cage has been opened. a search party will be organized. you are all sloppy bitches. that is all.
i forgot how loud opening a beer is in a house where your not allowed to drink
Randomize