I totally thought the tree was playing the guitar
sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
Man, the last time I saw you you were giving me a thumbs up while being pulled out the bar by your belt from some girl.
My vibrator challenges you to a duel.
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
drunk her ninja stole one of the pizzas as it arrived and hid all of the pieces in a cereal box in the fridge.Genius.
I hurt so much. Not in the emotional way, but in the I went to dive bars sorta way.
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
Learn from my mistakes, you naive soul: Gay love triangles are just as dangerous as straight love triangles.
I don't fucking know. He perched his parrot on his dick. I left after that.
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
I’m not spending 14 dollars on a margarita unless it’s rimmed with cocaine... actually do you have a blender?
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