Oh my god he is having a sentimental moment right now.
He just sent me like a really heartfelt confession of love in which he ended with "make the apt, I'll hold your hand while you get your clit pierced."
Sex on a kitchen table is not as amazing as they make is seem in the movies.
so i woke up on my toliet naked backwards. good night.
They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
the general consensus of people in the room is that i should have another bottle of wine.
"people in the room" being me.
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
On an unrelated side note: I shall now attempt to crawl to the bathroom. Where I will lay motionless on the cold ceramic bathtub with hot water pouring over my shivering body as I desperately try not to vomit. Good day.
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
remember how i yelled at you for inviting that coke dealer to the party?! i found the $100 bill they were snorting with in the couch.
..new slutty dresses or booze? i won't even waste time with the i told you so.
See, the Lortab wasn't working enough, so I thought "hey, vodka can speed that up! That's how science works!" Which probably should've been my indication that the Lortab was in fact working
So I've been in more fights on one leg than I've had on two.
I am stoned at Disneyland with my little brother. It's gonna be a good day.
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
I told my parents how nice the girl at the frogurt store was. I neglected to mention that I nearly lost my virginity to her via foursome.
I think I'm more excited for Santa to come now that I made a drinking game out of it
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