he saw my emergency pass-out-in-the-bathroom-after-drunken-puking cot in the bathroom.
im contemplating emailing my dad and telling him how worthless i am and how sorry i am that he pays for my life...aka my bar tabs.
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
You kept telling me how warm your bag of vomit was and asked me if i wanted to feel.
Also I walked home in over mitts \nLet's take a minute to really laugh about that
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
He said bring my breathalyzer and Anna's pepper spray, I didn't ask questions
is it too much for me to say that i have a ziplock bag with ice in it in my underwear?
So I was putting on a condom and looked to my right to not make eye contact, she said did you just look at the American flag while putting that on. I said this one's for Team USA.
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
how come you came home with "Amanda owns this" written on your forhead
Just watched my first Christmas porn of the year. Def have the spirit now
Does she know she is talking to people who slam shots of fireball and chase it with vodka?
I just want to meet a nice normal guy that doesn't want me to taze him while we have sex. . . . .is that too much to ask for?
Remind me to NEVER AGAIN mix beer with tequila with beer with whiskey with vodka with rum with vodka.
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