i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
I dont understand how a fully grown man could convince himself that lime green crocks would look good on him.
I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
I literally was just rolling on the ground and said to her 'this is what dying looks like'
He woke up in a dragon costume, covered in bong water. That was a party we will regret missing.
I just want someone to shove bread from panera down my throat
You really could become the cat lady we've always dreamed of.
It's like weed even makes my glasses better. Everything is so bright and clear and beautiful!
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
Interesting occurrence: the application I use to keep track of my periods and sexual encounters just notified me it had been over 4 months since you were logged as an active partner and ask if I'd like to remove you from my options. Wow, kmsl.
Woke up naked with a post-it that said "don't ask questions" on my ass...i know im not supposed to ask but uhm what did I do?
I just showered and shaved both ankles and one knee because that's the skin that's exposed in the jeans I'm wearing today. Please tell me I'm not the only one who does that.
After 8 hours of circus trick sex, his parents are both hugging me and kissing me on the cheek asking when I'm coming back over. Score?
Slept on the bathroom floor again. I hope when I turn 28 I’ll stop doing that
I think my stomach is breaking up with me. It's giving me back everything I ever gave it.
Randomize
