i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
He corrected me on my grammar when I came. Fuck English majors.
Yes, yes she is. This will teach her not to pull her vibrator out and harass people with it at parties.
Too drunk to talk to museum staff. So much for proper wednesdays
Well... this vagina won't eat itself
I just puked in my non fat yogurt... But it's non fat in hopes that someone wants to eat my vagina
Exactly. Some of us want to get married. And some of us want to wear sombreros and do cocaine. To each their own.
We shot off some fireworks at 12 and then I orchestrated the group singing of god bless the USA all while wearing a don't tread on me flag as a cape. I repped hard.
Things were easy when he was just a penis. Now he's a penis with feelings.
Did you hook up with him before or after he shaved off half of his eyebrow?
He started tongueing his parfait and told "thats what I'd to your ass" in the middle of Starbucks. Of course i brought him home
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
Probably going to live on vodka sodas and fireball shots
What the fuck was I thinking eating an entire tub of potato salad on acid. My stomach today bro
Randomize
