I don't understand why she insists on me walking her to the door. She came over for literally 8 minutes, we had sex, and now I need her to leave. That fake chivalry will change nothing about the situation.
NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head.
Is it bad that I stopped wanting to fuck her as soon as I noticed she had dry skin?
I sometimes completely doubt that you're straight.
before we even ate breakfast we'd found an eighth of weed in some old purse she never uses. it was gone by lunch
I awoke this morning to a naked boyfriend flying a remote controlled shark around his apartment. This is my life.
I feel like I knew it was fucked up, but feared that god would take my dick away if I didn't use it last night.
Like do you hear me I PUKED IN MY OWN HANDS AND HE STILL SAID I WAS GORGEOUS
Hypothetically how does one go about throwing away a dildo?
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
k. The important thing is we are going out. You are stones. I am mildly hallucenating.
Exactly man. Who needs doctors when you have vodka and hot knives.
But of course I'm in. After all, what fun would the holidays be without trying to find the perfect gift to impress someone you've never met, but need the approval of??
He was more upset that I got into his phone than about getting caught cheating.
You fist bumped my dick last night saying good game. That you'll be back for the 2nd game...
Randomize
