I want to make a zoo with you.
i want to give my vagina back to god and say no thank you
I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
I am in the hospital with a broken wrist because a guy told me that if I punched him it "wouldn't hurt." it hurt. me. Thank you 11 jello shots.
btw when he was trying to sleep i was apparently poking him in the face w my 'flipper' slurring random manatee facts
We sat on the porch laughing about hilarious the sunrise was. And that we can do drugs again in the morning, thank god
she is legit wearing a plastic bag around her neck as a necklace. she says it serves two purposes.
Do you know how I hurt my ankle or my shoulder? Or the origin of any of the following mystery bruises: left quad, left wrist, right elbow. Thanks for playing.
Dude, I passed out on the side walk, lost my phone and shirt, and walked 12 miles home after I disappeared from the club
My good Christian morals say no, but my complete disregard of anything related to religion says yes
Did my dad just see you doing a walk of shame?
Yup I waved.
My roommate walked in on my inserting a tampon. Somehow, I don't think this will be improving our relationship.
he's like the highest ranking tongue wizard i know.
He made a group chat with him, his wife, & I. Is this really life!??
I'm cuddly bitch. Deal with it.
Randomize
