If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
Do you think my parents will accept my drinking habits more if I told them I like to drink every night because I take good shits the next morning?
You crawled everywhere and rolled in ice cream. No more vodka for a month.
She found my wedding ring, sallowed it and wished me good luck explaining it to my wife before walking out. Now what?
A nice make out session never hurt anyone. Plus he's a pilot, so he'll know the safety procedures for when the night crashes and burns.
He was in the middle of making out with two girls at once, but then the guy next to me said "I feel like I'm watching Animal Planet" he stopped to give him a high five
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
I feel like I should treat myself every time I find out I'm not pregnant. Is there a pie company that delivers??
I literally woke up walked into the bathroom, threw up and died this morning. Then went to my 8am.
Please remind me next time not to call the ex who cheated on me to cry about the ex who forgave me for putting him in prison. It would be much appreciated.
WTF ARE YOU DOING IT'S FUCKING VEGAN COFFEE IT'S MADE WITH NUT MILK YOU'RE NOT A FUCKING SQUIRREL.
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
Randomize
