OH RELAX, IT WAS PITY SEX.....
my boyfriend just named your boyfriend's penis.
I have taken lazynest to a new level. I took a picture of the notes on the board instead of writing them. I win.
drunk making out is the fucking beeeest. specially when it's your exboyfriend
I wonder if you'll be as excited about this as you are now tomorrow morning.
I need to start giving them away because owning 20 dildos is never going to get me a boyfriend.
my roommate just showed up covered in dirt, drunk....with a whole ice cream cake that says "it's a girl".
marshmallow pipe was a success. so was melon pipe. come try it
we are all four or five tequila-induced decisions away from shitting in a bucket, come get me please.
We're at the hospital. She got a head rush and fell and now blood everywhere. Smoke the rest, just save her a bowl
Smoked Hookah in the playhouse last night. Childhood was so fun.
And apparently I was the one that started the drunken make out session that broke the window
My husband has seen you naked more times this week than me. I don't consider it a bad thing since you keep bringing the booze to our house. And because my tits are bigger.
No ive been in the mountains getting high and baking cookies with a 4 year old
Wanna go get tea? Warning: I will be high in an hour.
Well, let me first tell you that jack and cokes were ONE FUCKING DOLLAR.. It's like the club wanted me to make poor choices.
Randomize