he asked me to help him wrap his girlfriends birthday presents. Dont worry we fucked right after.
you looked up at me mid puke with tears in your eyes and asked to make sure no one took your turn at Wii
Wella between the drunkards, the inevitable slutty costumes, and someone doing a BODY SHOT OFF A PREGNANT GIRL, i lost my halloween spirit. Bah humbug.
One night stand. Woke up at her dad's house. She already left for work. Shit's about to go down.
you tried to fill your inhaler with vodka
I just threw up every bad decision and it hurts
I just got head while watching air force one. Harrison ford would be proud.
wearing the bible to the ABC party, thought you'd appreciate that.
If you go to Tinseltown tonight. First bathroom on the left, second stall. Avoid. It's still coming to terms with what I did to it.
I made one of my coworkers cheers to me not being pregnant. I've never talked to him before tonight. Keeping it classy.
He's driving 2 hours to visit me and he's bringing weed. I love him so much.
Tinder recommend to a friend: making threesomes easier since 2016
apparently I kept repeating I have a to do list this summer and he's on it
is it bad that I see hot guys I wanna sleep with as challenges instead of actual people?
yes. but it works for you
I’m a women at a strip club dressed as post Malone
Randomize
