whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
My roommate got wasted last night and went to the 24 hour Bally's Total Fitness at 3 A.M. He got back took his shirt off, made a protein shake, puked, asked me if he was almost as jacked as Ronnie Coleman then called ME gay before I could say anything and went to bed
totally watching dr. phil and getting eaten out right now. be jealous.
Yea i traded my bed for half a bag of jimmy johns jalepno chips, am I proud of it no, Am I happy I did it? yes
a cemetary is a place for people to rest in peace and you just spermed all over their land
He passes out, I smoke his kush. All's fair in love and a disappointing lack of sex.
She called him at 5 AM so that he'd be ready for her birthday breakfast and drinks at 6. This is why people don't need to wait until their 21st to have their first drink.
I GOOGLED IT. BEES CAN MASTURBATE. WHAT.
Just walked by the neighbors and they are definitely butt naked sitting on a bed, watching Netflix, baked out of their minds, with the blinds open.
Welcome to Bellingham.
you were caressing the jar of pickles then you looked down and whispered to them "I want you inside me"
Their first impression of me was that I was completely naked. So yeah college hasn't even started yet and I'm already that person.
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
Just FYI....you totally yelled out Royals while we were having sex last night lol.
Only in the emergency room do they shut the door when youre laughing too hard
Randomize
