Dude I can't believe you let me go home with the wildabeast lastnight.
You always hook up with hot girls we had to know you were mortal
So we walked by this chick's house and she starts yelling at her boyfriend "STOP HITTING ME WITH YOUR DICK"
how was your day?
fuck the small talk. are you bringing the liquor tonight or am i?
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
What are you doing? Did I punch you in the face last night?
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
He just brought a live lobster to the party.
So is it your turn now to pretend like dating someone else would stop us from fucking?
Facebook is for cat videos and having better lives than people from high school, period.
I just want him to make us coffee. And whack off into the sunset
His exact words: "I don't have anything you can't treat with antibiotics."
Just found out the last guy I hooked up with is being held in a federal prison under suspicion of stealing 175k.
What do you think would be the best way to remove a baby carrot from a vagina?
Randomize
