It's like having an annoying little brother who wants to have sex with you
you never realize your highschool teachers are real people till you fuck one of them
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
My face is bruised from laying on the concrete. NO MORE VODKA!
The only thing that was weird was that it WASN'T weird when she got out of the shower and saw me blowing him.
I should work for the FBI. Or planned parenthood.
That's quite a broad spectrum. What did you do?
I ripped the door frame off last night too. Just remembered.
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
It was incredible. For as long as I live, I will gladly drop whatever I'm doing and spend a night with her face between my legs ANY time she asks.
I am decidedly straight, but I'll write it into my wedding vows if I have to.
I have vodka and a slip n slide so of you could come over that would be great
My morning started with my mom giving me the number for a substance abuse councellor. How's your day going?
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
Afterwards I drank a whole bottle of cake vodka in the bathtub while he was bawling his eyes out. Hands down weirdest hookup I've ever had.
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
I remember turning to Jon after doing a line of coke and saying "I was a Girl Scout"
Randomize
