Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
He keeps whispering to me that he can't wait to tie my hands up with my wig?
She said, and I quote "how do you run with something that big between your legs".
He cheated on me in real life. I can cheat at words with friends.
The only thing I remember is vomiting and then feeding my dog a Mcdonalds cheeseburger and telling him yolo
You challenged yourself to walk backwards all the way to the bar... And you did
I found a pair a guys underwear in my purse that has a British flag on it and says and I quote "British beef" what.the.fuck.
So, since you're now a four night stand, I feel comfortable asking: Did I leave my sunglasses at your house? Or my underwear?
Happy Thanksgiving! Hope its not too awkward that your dad and your boyfriend are the same age.
He rubbed my back afterwards. I forgot how to talk and I legitimately thought I was a cat for a few minutes.
I NEED A MOM FRIEND. NOW.
Gotta love college... Pregamed for my 8:30 flight home this morning and gave the flight attendants all high fives when I got on the plane. Best ride of my life.
I’m sorry I pressured you for dick pics.
I ended up sleeping with him in a public bathroom because neither of us remembered where we lived. I have hit a new low.
The salt made it so good this margarita is touching my soul. I swear I'm not high BUT I want elote in a cup with the insides of a shrimp taco. I think that would make my life complete.
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