yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
Last night you told her she was rocking the beer gut. Still wondering why you have that black eye?
i'm smoking hookah in a kayak. how did this happen.
Just made out with the bride... She was still in her dress & I was still in my bridesmaid dress, how's that for an album picture?!?
Have $25 to my name but it's $2 pitchers. I have no choice but to go.
I love you. Thanks for all the blowjobs.
Boob shaped ice luge is ordered for my bday. Boom
I can't even drink.
The liquor comes out the nipples. Out. The. Nipples.
Found a popcorn kernel in my pubes... Time fir a Brazilian
Jesus himself couldn't make a better sandwich
didn't realize her mom was home while we were fucking, but she's oddly okay with it. she made us food afterwards. but then kept talking about having grand kids the whole time. is it time to bail?
Please don't call my dad a fuckpuppet, I feel like that would be awkward to explain later.
Well I can cross 'get my dick slathered in coconut oil while watching the bob's burgers porn parody' off my bucket list.
You yell at me for being attracted to older guys and you're over here condoning murder
If he brings home bacon, dont let him leave. Dont screw this one up. this may be our last chance.
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
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