He had on juicy sweatpants and thats when i knew he was no longer a threat.
he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
I think I just saw the silver monkey from legends of the hidden temple sitting out in someone's trash
GO. BACK. NOW.
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
it's like doing a sit-up... but, you're inside someone
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
I just walked past a woman in the bar stroking a mans crotch, yelling 'I made this. I made this happen.'
Petty good. I just stapled a 5 dollar bill onto the chest of a sword swallower.
Codeine + Boredom = Sprinting between my front and back door.
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
I was chasing pulls of fireball with bites of a bagel and yelling at people to take tequila shots with me. I shouldn't be allowed to go out alone.
She has a bong hits for Jesus shirt. Of course I'm going to like her.
He told me he sees me like a sister then 10 mins later tried to make out with me.
So, if you were also having sex around 11pm, then we were legitimately being penetrated at the exact same time. That is amazing. We are soul sisters.
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