My penis looks like a roll of pennies
Oh. Ok. I get the hint.
Like a roll of pennies where the paper got wet & then dried all wrinkly and weird...
She has a t-rex face on a stuart little body.
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
there r dinosaurs outside my house i hear them
pretty sure those are just snow plows....go back to bed
I just took my friends on a tour of all the places I've had sex in my house. I dont know if that's more slutty, or the fact that it took 2 hours to complete..
Horrible. I told her my girlfriend is in the hospital and she tried to give me a lapdance.
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
This morning i put band aids over my nipples bc i was too lazy to put on a bra. Think I've reached a new low.
Positive reinforcement! I'm training him for being a good boy and coming over. He gets sex and cookies.
Go forth my friend, but don't do any of that fruitful and multiplying shit.
I didn't tell that thing I wasn't coming over. Whoops
You know you haven't dated in a while when you call boys "that thing" and call dates "a boy type thing."
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
You ran outside of the party to do the rain dance and swim in puddles
Do you not realize that being Batman fulfills about 95% of my non-sexual fantasies?
Randomize