i just drank a strangers drink off a toilet
you can't get genital warts from dogs can you?
operation harelip BJ is a go
So how many shot glasses of coffee grounds make a pot?
my step dad just called me a drunken slut..someone in my family finally understands me
His body is like Jesus fingering me while I eat birthday cake
people at meijer look at you funny when you have 37 bottles of champagne in your cart.
these girls were driving down the road screaming "SHOT!!" out the windows and pelting potatoes at passerby.
i got hit in the ear.
I forgot that I thought it would be a good idea to hairspray my toilet seat last night after I took 12 shots of vodka so when I just went to pee, I stuck to the toilet. Never drinking again.
dude, I convinced you I was your conscience for like 15 minutes last night. you weren't just "a little high"
Last night I went to spank her while she was riding me and sack-tapped myself.
They put me in room 420 every time and I take bubble baths and smoke in the room and they bring food TO MY BED
He was singing R-E-S-P-E-C-T to a stripper between motorboats while our HR manager cheered him on.
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
I wasnt 2 drunk i sobered up around the time we were shooting the fire extinguishers
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